A story of love madness and others

A long time ago, before the world was created and humans set foot on
it, God had put all the human "qualities" in a separate room. Since
all the qualities were bored they decided to play hide & seek.

"Madness" was one of the qualities and he shouted: "I want to count,
I want to count!" And since nobody was crazy enough to want to seek
"Madness", all the other qualities agreed. So "Madness" leaned
against a tree and started to count: "One, two, three..." As
"Madness" counted, the qualities went hiding.

"Reason" hid in a pile of garbage.. "Lie " said that it would hide
under a stone, but hid at the bottom of the lake.

And Madness continued to count "... seventy nine, eighty, eighty
one..." By this time, all the qualities were already hidden-except
"Love ". For stupid as "Love" is, he could not decide where to hide.
And this should not surprise us, because we all know how difficult it
is to hide "Love".

"Madness": "...ninety five, ninety six, ninety seven..." Just when
"Madness" got to one hundred........."Love" jumped into a rose bush
where he hid.

And Madness turned around and shouted: "I'm coming, I'm coming!" As
Madness turned around, "Laziness" was the first to be found, because
"Laziness" was too lazy to hide. "Madness" searched madly and found
"Lie" at the bottom of the lake. One by one, Madness found them all -
except Love.

Madness was getting desperate, unable to find Love.

Envious of Love, "Envy" whispered to "Madness ": "You only need to
find Love, and Love is hiding in the rose bush."

"Madness" Jumped on the rose bush and he heard loud cry. The thorns
in the bush had pierced Love's eyes.

Hearing the commotion God came into the room and saw what had
happened. He got very angry and cursed "Madness" and said since
"Love" has become blind because of u.....u shall always be with him".

And so it came about that from that day on, Love is blind and is
always accompanied by Madness!

************************

A woman comes home and tells her husband, "Remember those headaches
I've been having all these years? Well, they're gone."

"No more headaches?" the husband asks, "What happened?"

His wife replies, "Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to
stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat 'I do not have
a headache; I do not have a headache, I do not have a headache.' It
worked! The headaches are all gone."

The husband replies, "Well, that is wonderful."

His wife then says, "You know, you haven't been exactly a ball of
fire in the bedroom these last few years. Why don't you go see the
hypnotist and see if he can do anything for that?"

The husband agrees to try it.

Following his appointment, the husband comes home, rips off his
clothes, picks up his wife and carries her into the bedroom. He puts
her on the bed and says, "Don't move, I'll be right back." He goes
into the bathroom and comes back A few minutes later and jumps into
bed and makes passionate love to his wife like never before.

His wife says, "Boy, that was wonderful!"

The husband says, "Don't move! I will be right back."

He goes back into the bathroom, comes back and round two was even
better than the first time. The wife sits up and her head is spinning.

Her husband again says, "Don't move, I'll be right back."

With that, he goes back in the bathroom. This time, his wife quietly
follows him and there, in the bathroom, she sees him standing at the
mirror and saying, "She's not my wife. She's not my wife. She's not my wife!"

His funeral services will be held on Monday

************
A man had great tickets for the World Cup Final.

As he sits down, another man comes down and asks if anyone is sitting
in the empty seat next to him.

"No," he says. "The seat is empty."

"This is incredible!" says the other man. "Who in their right mind
would have a seat like this for the World Cup Final, the biggest
sporting event, and not use it?"

"Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife was supposed to come
with me, but she passed away. This is the first World Cup Final we
haven't been to together since we got married."

"Oh ... I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. But couldn't you
find someone else, a friend or relative, or even a neighbour to take
the seat?"

The man shakes his head. "No. They're all at the funeral."