Confucius says...

• Man who kisses tits always gets bust face.
• Man pays and lays woman on soft ground, then gets hard up.
• Glamour girl works for MGM all day and FOX at night.
• Woman use lemon for dinche - gets sour puss
• Man dances with girl, puts mirror on shoes , sees real colour of hair.
• He who plays golf in wet weather comes home with wet balls.
• Newly weds go for honey moon six days only - seventh day makes whole week.
• Squeeze lemon in front of synagogue - see jews come out.
• Man puts rooster in fridge - gets stiff cock.
• Woman in aeroplane upside down , soon have crack up.
• She who plays in spring soon gets offspring.
• Man is pimp become crack salesman.
• Man with athletic finger make broad jump.
• Man go to bed with sex problem in mind wake up find solution in hand.
• Girlfriend in jockeys lap gets hot tip.
• Mistress in husbands lap make harder for wife.
• Girl sitting in boss' lap gets quick rise.
• Girl sitting in judges lap gets honourable discharge
• Silly man gives wife piano, wise man give organ.
• Girl with boyfriend with foreign features must keep him out of dark room - he has Russian hands and Roman fingers.